You don't know me!

“ While Jesus was in Bethany in the home of Simon the Leper, a woman came to him with an alabaster jar of very expensive perfume, which she poured on his head as he was reclining at the table. When the disciples saw this, they were indignant. “Why this waste?” they asked. “This perfume could have been sold at a high price and the money given to the poor.” Aware of this, Jesus said to them, “Why are you bothering this woman? She has done a beautiful thing to me.” Matthew 26:6-11

Have you ever been in a desert? Have you ever been dehydrated? Have you ever had a dry and parched throat? Let me explain why I ask those questions.

Desert conditions are extreme – dry, arid with low humidity and high evaporation rates. Temperatures can swing from very hot days to cold nights. It can be windy with dust storms which cause low visibility. Low vegetation, which means lack of nourishment and food sources are minimal.

The effects on the body of one wandering in the desert can also be extreme. Dehydration due to lack of enough water source, loss of fluids by sweating and just breathing can cause major dysfunction in the body like exhaustion, confusion, organ failure, and death.

Fortunately for the person who has a survivor or fight mentality, they will push themselves to find sources of shelter, food, and water but the exhaustion still comes in waves. There will be moments of lucid thoughts of hope and salvation but there will also be thoughts of hopelessness and a desire for relief, even through death. Someone with a dry and parched throat can barely utter a sound to express their hope. Someone with dust and sand in their eyes can only see what is right in front of them and not the vision of the relief that is promised. Someone who is exhausted moves at a different pace from day to day – just to survive. Some days are better than others depending on how much the person is able to rest, receive nourishment, and shelter the day & night before.

When rescue comes the one lost in the desert feels extreme relief, but their body cannot express the joy and relief their heart feels because their circumstances have wreaked havoc on their bodies. It will take time and consistent compassionate care of physical needs for their body to respond. No one judges the body’s ability to recover or the fact that just because one doesn’t respond as fast as the other, they’re not recovering just the same. Also, the natural personality of the person being rescued comes into play. If they are reserved or quite, they may not jump and shout their joy. They may sag in relief or cry silently. If they are the strong silent type and have been struggling for a long time, they may do nothing but say thank you and break down when they are alone.

Apply these same thoughts to mental, emotional, and spiritual deserts. Especially the spiritual desert because it is the very core of our being. When a person has been in a desert that involves the spirit and suddenly finds a place of relief, the spirit is joyful but everything else has to catch up. Spiritual exhaustion impacts EVERY part of a person – mind and body included.

Just because my hands don’t lift high enough or my praise doesn’t shout loud enough for you – doesn’t mean the joy it isn’t there. If I don’t run, jump, shout, or even lift my hands doesn’t mean my spirituality is lower than yours. Maybe I’m tired. Maybe I’m weak or MAYBE – here me out now, my personality isn’t boisterous. Maybe I’m reserved to the core of my being and God is working on, in and through me using my very own personality – not yours. That’s all part of being in the body of Christ. People are different and they respond differently to God, their circumstances, life, etc.

My point is this, you don’t know the cost of my alabaster box. People did not understand why Mary poured very expensive perfume on Jesus’ head and feet. To them it was a waste of effort and money. To some it is hard to understand how people can just sit or stand in the midst of church worship time. You don’t know what it cost them in effort just to put one foot in front of the other to make it to church. Maybe their physical, mental, and emotional capacity was spent just to get there – BUT they made it. Their spirit rejoiced because they made it. You may not have seen it. The person beside them may not have seen it but God did, and He rejoiced because they made it another step after being in the desert.

Instead of judging my spirituality because of how I worship when you only see me at a particular time. How about rejoicing with me that I made it this far on this day. You don’t see me in my car or in my home. Maybe I’m not comfortable with corporate worship because of what I’ve been through. Maybe I’m just a shy and reserved person. That doesn’t mean that my spirituality should be questioned. Comments about how a person worships in a corporate setting is one of the very reasons people stop going to corporate worship services. You just told me I wasn’t good enough in your eyes.